Random topic today. I was thinking it was about time that I wrote about something medical seeing as one of the first things I mentioned about myself was that I'm a medical student, and the first thing I always think about is the patients.
Well, perhaps I shouldn't call them patients, because obviously I've never actually treated anyone, however we have examined and taken histories from real people in real hospitals, so, for all intents and purposes, they are patients.
I have great respect for patients, especially those who have been diagnosed with a long term or terminal illness. These people just smile, make jokes and get on with their lives, I remember one woman in particular, who was on oxygen that she had to wheel around with her everywhere, and had done for about the last fifteen years, yet she was as cheery as anyone else and made jokes about her condition. One man had severe complications from a stroke and could barely speak, yet he still let us come into his house and made every effort he could to communicate with us. To me it shows how resilient people can be, and this is why I have so much respect for patients and I hope that throughout my career this never changes.
I often wonder how I would personally react if I was diagnosed with a long term illness such as motor degenerative disease or Huntingtons. If I was told that inside me there was a ticking time bomb that was going to slowly get worse and worse until it eventually went off and I died. Would I continue with my life and try and live as normally as possible or would I break off and try to accomplish something big before I prematurely passed away? I don't think I can even tell what I'd do unless I was in that position, but I really hope that I'm not.
And if I was diagnosed with a terminal illness what would I do? Woul I regress into myself just waiting for the moment when it all stopped? Would I go out into the world determined to do some good before I die? Would I tell that special girl that I love her and hope for the best? Or would I just try and get on with my life? It's such a massive bombshell that I don't know how anyone ever deals with it; I suppose some people turn to their faith but some of us don't have that luxury....who do we turn to for comfort? I don't fear death as I believe that after death I won't feel anything anyway, but for that reason I want to try and stay on this earth for as long as possible....which is why I find it hard to think how I would react in that situation as how do you react to the idea that you're going to soon be cast into oblivion, just suddenly ceasing to exist?
Death. Death surrounds every single one of us. It's funny how people always come up with Euphamisms about death, and avoid talking about it directly, yet it is the only thing that is inevitably going to happen to all of us. I always found it odd that, despite a lot of people believing in an afterlife and a heaven, these people still fear death. Is this a show of doubt in extreme circumstances or is it just simply human nature?
I already have my burial plans (I'm well aware this is morbid lol)....I want to be buried in my own back yard and a sapling planted over me....or maybe even a whole garden. That way my wife (?) and kids (?) and family can go and know the are close to me. Also I like the idea of being recycled into something that is life instead of being thrown in the ground in a wooden box and pushing up daisies or burnt to a crisp and scattered somewhere. I want to be made vital in my own death.
Recently I lost two friends (one suddenly and one to a long term struggle against an illness) and I was greatly saddened by these deaths. There's nothing worse than a young person having their life taken away from them...there's something unjust about it. It's odd the emotions that death brings about in people: Sadness obviously, greed, Happiness in some cases and , in my case, anger. I just felt completely pissed off about these deaths yet I had no-one to be angry with. It was emotion directed at no-one....but it was my way of dealing with it. I'm sure I'm not the only one either.
Well, I'd like to say that that post was really just everything flowing straight from my brain to my typing fingers, so it's not exactly structured or probably in any way enjoyale to read....but fair play for sticking through it if you got to this point lol. These are my thoughts in their purest form...and I think in this post you've seen the more humanitarian side of my psyche because, whether you believe it or not from my other posts I do have one.
Thanks for taking the time to read this if you did, and I hope you got something out of it.
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